Can I See Some I.D. Please?

From Coppertone site

I am aware that sunscreen is a good thing and I know that the “Bain de Soleil” tans of the 80’s aren’t in style but since when did it become impossible to buy anything less than SPF 15?  I went to the store to buy sunscreen for the summer and on my list was Aveeno SPF 30 for my face, Coppertone SPF 30 Spray for the kids, SPF 15 for good measure, and lastly a bottle of SPF 8 just because.  I stood there searching for that brown container that holds the promise of a golden tan but I couldn’t find it.  The only brown bottle in the entire section was a bottle of Hawaiian Tropic tanning oil on the bottom shelf.  I love a tan but even I know that tanning oil went out of vogue when “Sun In” left the shelves.

How is it possible that I couldn’t find SPF 8?  Did it get placed behind the pharmacy counter with the Benadryl and other dangerous “over the counter” drugs?  Is there an age restriction or a quantity constraint – limit one per customer per summer season?  I guess the powers that be have decided that anything less than SPF 15 is just criminal.  Then I learned about the “Tan Tax” that was passed with the health care reform bill.  This imposes a 10% tax on tanning bed salons.  Talk about legislation.  Did the administration also add a 10% tax on lotions boasting less than SPF 15?  First a tax on drinking, then smoking, and now tanning, what’s next, frosted lip stick?

As a kid I don’t ever remember using sun screen unless we were specifically headed to the beach for the day.  In fact it was only applied if we were headed to the beach at the ocean, ponds didn’t count.  And even then, it was a bottle of Coppertone 6.  Sure, we would get a little burned, nothing a little Noxzema couldn’t cure.  I realize I am showing my age when I write this.  Intuitively I know that I should be careful in the sun and certainly I don’t want to look like Magda, the leathery lady from “Something about Mary” but I also don’t aspire to look like pasty white Angela from “The Office”.  So I scrounged around the drawers in my house and finally turned up a bottle of 8 the same day a friend of mine turned up hers.  We made a pact to share this coveted lotion of yesteryear.  As for my kids, yes, I dutifully chase them around with pink or white bottles of SPF 30+.  They’ll never know anything less.  As for Noxzema, I think it’s out of stock.